Bambino's Pizza and Mediterranean Grill

Bambino's Pizza and Mediterranean Grill

6300 San Mateo Blvd NE,

Albuquerque, NM 8710

Bambino’s is another of the “fast-casual” restaurants that are so popular these days.  You walk in, order at the counter, and someone delivers your meal to you.   It’s a typical sort of quasi fast food idea and the restaurant reflects that sentiment.  There are lots of tables and booths, all of which look brand new and attractive, and the dining area was clean.  There was a radio playing very loud music in the kitchen that was rather annoying and we weren’t sure if it was supposed to provide background sound for the dining room or not.  However, it was turned to a station with lots of commercials for cars and sales, so if it was for the diners’ enjoyment, somebody should look for a station with more music or perhaps pipe in satellite radio or put on a CD.

The dining room features large pictures on the walls with scenes from Venice, Italy, Corfu, Greece, Jerusalem, and New York City.  We weren’t quite sure what to make of the selection of locations as some had tie-ins to the Italian/Mediterranean offerings on the menu, but some did not. Generally, it was kind of weird.  Walking up to the restaurant, there are signs on the front window advertising specials and a big neon sign blinking OPEN OPEN OPEN.  Overall there is basically zero atmosphere. 

The menu is extensive and divided in two – one side Italian dishes like pizza, baked ziti, lasagna, etc.  The other featuring Greek dishes with a big selection of pita sandwiches, gyros, and Greek specialties with the restaurant’s own twist.  We decided to stick with Greece and ordered the Pita with Tzatziki for an appetizer, one Fat Veggie Pita, one Fat Greek Pita, and Almond Tiramisu for dessert. Both fat pitas were from the restaurant’s specialty menu.

After you order, you pour your own drinks from the soda fountain and pitchers of ice water on the bar.  The kitchen is an open concept but the only part you can see is the prep kitchen.  The cooking is done further back where the radio is located.

We started with the Pita and Tzatziki.  The pita was warm and soft and cut into four triangles.  The tzatziki sauce was delicious with lots of dill and cucumber chunks, but it was slightly thin and runny instead of being thick and rich.  It looked like the yogurt needed to be strained a couple more times to remove the excess water.  In spite of that, it was very fresh and very delicious.  We did feel that for one pita and a very small cup of tzatziki, the $3.99 price was very high. 

The Fat Veggie Pita was a soft, warm pita filled to overflowing with falafel, hummus, feta cheese, one stuffed grape leaf, lettuce, tomato, red onion, and tzatziki.  It was a large serving and parts of it were quite good.  We could not locate the hummus and wondered if it had been spread on the pita.  The stuffed grape leaf was not good, the filling heavy and not appetizing.  There was about a tablespoon of tzatziki on the entire sandwich, which wasn’t near enough, but the falafel was delicious!  It was crisp and fat, and quite tasty.  Overall there was a lot of good flavor (except for the stuffed grape leaf) and more than enough for one.  Not sure we would order it again because although it was good, it wasn’t exceptional. 

Fat Veggie Pita

The Fat Greek Pita was another soft, warm pita filled with gyro meat, the menu said “chicken fingers” but they didn’t have those so they put in regular chicken,  a fried mozzarella stick, and tzatziki.  First of all, the mozzarella stick did not work in this combination, and we removed them which improved the flavor combination immediately.  The chicken – we’re wondering where the grill is in the “Mediterranean Grill” part of the restaurant’s name – was dry and tasted like someone took frozen chicken and microwaved it to the point of being unappetizing.  We ordered this dish thinking we were branching out and trying something new, but it’s basically a gyro with added dry chicken.  We imagine it would be worse with the fried chicken fingers so we’re grateful we didn’t get those.  There was a lot of grease in this sandwich, and it dripped out as we ate it.  Again, there was about a tablespoon of tzatziki sauce, not nearly enough, and we asked for more, which we got pretty quickly.  The sauce helped, but we wouldn’t order this again. 

Fat Greek Pita
A picture is worth a thousand words...

Moving on to dessert, we were brought a small plastic container with a snap on lid of the Almond Tiramisu.  We’ve had lots of tiramisu and really it’s a crime to call this concoction by the same name.  First of all, there were no lady fingers dipped in espresso.  The base was some sort of cake that tasted pre-packaged and not fresh.  The cream was something undefined.  We are thinking it’s some combination of mascarpone cheese and instant pudding of some sort.  There was the taste of artificial flavorings that we didn’t like, and there was some sort of mystery topping on top with chopped almonds.  We never did figure out what the topping was.  Overall, this tasted pre-packaged, not fresh, and had a cloying, sweet, off flavor.  We did not like it and for the $5.00 price tag, felt it was priced way too high.

Almond Tiramisu

Some things at Bambino’s were very good.  The parts of the menu that seem to be made fresh – the falafel, the tzatziki, and the pitas – were all delicious.  Everything else was uninspired and quite average.  The whole experience wsa dissonant from the flavors to the prices per item to the fact that you can only get forks and knives in silverware, but if you want a spoon, you have to have plastic.  Bambino's menu is extensive and maybe if you went a dozen or more times you would discover what else is good, but that’s not an exercise we’ll take on.  We probably would not go again unless we were in the area and really, really hungry. 

Five - Berkeley, CA

Five

Suite #5, 2086 Allston Way  
Berkeley, CA 94704

Blue is located in the Hotel Shattuck Plaza in downtown Berkeley. The location is just off the main drag and to a non-local, it could be missed.  Typically hotel food isn’t the best and I was somewhat reluctant to try it, but so many locals had recommended it that I decided to give it a try and I was blown away.  

A menu with the daily specials and a bread basket were brought to the table immediately.

The inside of the restaurant has a mix of décor that is inviting and interesting to look at.  It draws a mixed crowd from Berkeley casual to the more sophisticated and chic patrons.  I was seated at a table for two that had a nice velveteen wrap around booth.  There were few diners at the early evening and I spent some time taking in the live blues music and reading through the menu.  Ultimately I decided on the special – BBQ, Booze, and Blues.  The picture below shows the offerings (booze was not actually part of the special, but there were many drink specials on the menu). 

The view from the bar

Chandeliers like this one are located around the restaurant

I elected for the Beef Brisket and BBQ Chicken as my meat choices. While I waited, bread and butter and a glass of water were brought to me.  The wait staff was very attentive and I appreciated that I never had to ask for a drink refill.

I didn’t have much of a wait for dinner to be served as there weren’t too many people present.  I was delighted by the presentation and also by the aromas that wafted from the plate as it was set in front of me.  The chicken was so tender it fell off the bone and had a rich smoky sauce on it.  The brisket also had a smoky sauce on it, but not the same as the chicken.  It was so incredibly tender and was unlike anything I’ve ever eaten before.  I happened to be sitting beside the general manager of the restaurant and the executive chef, Banks White, came out to find out how he was enjoying his meal.  I overheard Chef White say the brisket had been cooked for fourteen hours at 200 degrees - low and slow and oh so good!  The corn was sweet and perfectly cooked.  The combination of lime and a hint of chile were heavenly and a delight to my taste buds.  The potato salad was made with red potatoes, mustard, mayo, and chopped green onions.  This was my least favorite of the side dishes as the onions were overpowering and the potato salad needed salt.  It was better than your average restaurant or grocery store variety, but it lacked the wow factor of the other offerings.  What the potato salad lacked, the onion rings made up for tenfold.  They were perfect!!  Crunchy batter contrasted well with the soft onion, the salty onion paired flawlessly with the hint of sweet in the batter. 

Clockwise from top left:
Potato Salad, Onion Rings, Corn, Chicken, Brisket, BBQ sauce

Peach cobbler a la mode was served for dessert and it smelled wonderful.  Served in a tiny cast iron skillet, the presentation as delightful and I was happy to hear that the gelato was locally made at a shop down the street that day.  It had a creamy, nutty flavor that made me want more and even now as I write up the review I could go for more of that delicious gelato!  The cobbler had a subtle and almost weak flavor – the crust was weak and the peach flavor was basically lost.  But that gelato…more than made up for it!

Peach cobbler a la mode

Five is the type of dining experience everyone should have at least once in his or her life – flavors harmonizing and all senses stimulated (hence the name Five -- an experience for all five senses).  The meal itself was truly an experience I savored and enjoyed in every possible way.  I was so pleased by the meal, I went online to research Chef Banks’s background.  He is the graduate of the New England Culinary Institute and his studies have served him well.  What a great find this restaurant was!

Blu American Eatery - Petaluma, CA

Blu American Eatery

140 2nd St. #100 

Petaluma, CA 94952

Blu is located in Petaluma’s downtown and waterfront district.  Conveniently located on a corner near the movie theater and the free parking structure, it’s perfectly positioned to attract passersby such as ourselves.

The inside of the restaurant is contemporary and very open with lots of windows and space between the tables.  We sat at a booth near the window and found that it was fairly poorly set up because the table moved, but the booth seat did not so both of us were uncomfortably far away from the table when it was placed evenly between us.  Finally we pushed the table closer to one side and sat next to each other for convenience.

We both decided on pancakes – the blueberry buttermilk and the lemon ricotta.  Our order was taken promptly and our drinks were brought to us almost instantly after ordering.  When the food arrived it was piping hot and had fresh strawberries and blueberries on top.  The plates looked identical and at first we didn’t know whose pancakes were whose.  Since we had already decided to split both, we dug in and soon figured out which was which.

Lemon ricotta pancakes with chicken sausage

The lemon ricotta pancakes were very moist and had a nice hint of sweet and tart.  They were piping hot and needed several seconds between bites to cool down.  Warm syrup was served on the side, but didn’t lend itself well to the lemon ricotta combination.  A better pairing would have been fresh whipped cream for a more subtle sweet flavor.  The pancakes were served with a side of chicken apple sausage.  Chicken sausage is a trend in Northern CA and I learned that Petaluma used to be a major chicken farming area.  This sausage was good, but lacked the flavor of other chicken sausages I had during the trip. 

The blueberry buttermilk pancakes were okay, but nothing to write home about.  The texture was unimpressive and we mostly just ate the blueberry pancakes with a bite of the lemon ricotta pancakes.  The combination made for an enjoyable eating experience.  This was also served with traditional maple syrup and it left much to be desired and lacked imagination or creativity.  We were put off by the fact that we were given one small serving of syrup to share between the two plates.  It was presumptuous and would have been better had they either given us each a serving or given us a larger serving adequate for sharing.

While Blu met our basic hunger needs, it fell short of the wow factor we seek when going out to eat.

Rick & Ann's - Berkeley, CA

Rick & Ann’s

2922 Domingo Ave.

Berkeley, CA 94075

Rick & Ann’s has been a Berkeley favorite since it opened in 1989.  The restaurant is small with a mix of indoor and outdoor patio seating.  Located in a somewhat tucked away strip of shops, Rick & Ann’s is in a classic Californian 1950s style building with lots of windows and nice skylights that truly bring the outside in. The décor is simple and the focus is truly on the experience rather than on the small animal paintings on the wall, however for the parties interested in the art, it is for sale. The art seems a little out of place and had I not been paying close attention, I probably never would have noticed it.

Charming setting at the community table

There are just a couple of seats at the bar overlooking the kitchen and the tables are small serving mostly parties of two or four, but an unexpected surprise is a large country-style table in the middle of the dining room.  A community dining table, this offers seating to larger parties without having to wait to have adjacent tables cleared and rearranged and also provides the solo diner the opportunity to engage with the group if desired.  The day I visited I was alone and took the chance of finding good conversation at the community table.  I was seated with a big family and across the table from an older gentleman intently focused on his magazine.  No conversation for me, but that was okay because I was completely taken in by the menu.

As I waited for my order to be taken, I intently read about the history of the restaurant and then tried to decide between the four or five brunch dishes that caught my eye.  The dining room is small, but the kitchen fills the space with heavenly aromas.  Rick & Ann’s menu offers American classics with a twist.  I decided on their signature Erica’s French Toast which consists of challah dipped in orange cardamom batter which can be ordered as a short stack (two pieces) or a regular stack (three pieces).  I’d read good reviews about it on various websites and I was eager to try it before I even set foot in the restaurant.

While I was there one of the Saturday specials also caught my eye – the Scrambled Eggs with New Mexico sausage, sautéed sweet peppers, onions, and jack cheese.  This dish is served with home fries topped with sour cream and chopped green onions and your choice of toast, muffin, or scone.  Having lived in NM for some time I was interested in what this New Mexico sausage might be because I was previously unaware of the fact that we had any particular type of sausage claim to fame.  As it turns out New Mexico sausage is chicken sausage with poblano chile and does not come from New Mexico.  When I asked the manager about it, he said that the brand that sells the sausage has branded is because calling it New Mexico sausage was trendier than it being regular sausage.  Curious about it in spite of the fact that it was a bootleg New Mexico product, I ordered a side of this sausage to give it a try.  

The menu boasts the use of cage and hormone free eggs and has a variety of original menu offered in the “Favorites” section.  The prices range from $5.25 for Favorites to $11 for Saturday Specials.  There are also brunch cocktails offered for around $6 as well as fresh juices, sodas, and unexpected delights like Martinelli’s sparkling cider and gourmet soft drinks.

My food arrived after about 10 minutes and the menu warned that the French toast takes longer to prepare, so I had lots of time to check out the clientele.  It was a nice mix of what looked like UC Berkeley students, families, and retirees.  Everyone was very casual and relaxed, there to enjoy the company and good food.  The man sitting across from me ordered the potato and cheese pancakes that came topped with sour cream and chopped green onions and had a side of apple sauce.  It looked great and had he not dug right in, I would have taken a picture of it!

The French toast was fluffy and moist and practically melted in my mouth.  I was disappointed that I didn’t get the cardamom flavor until close to the end.  I held back on the syrup in the hopes that I could get a hint of the flavor, but it was indiscernible until I got to the end.  The last couple bites were delicious though!

Challah French Toast with a side of New Mexico sausage

The New Mexico sausage did not disappoint – in a word it’s scrumptious!  It was savory and had a hint of poblano, but was more pepper flavor than spicy.  I’m not sure if corn is in the sausage, but there were corn kernels in the bowl that added an element of sweet, cool juiciness that complimented the sausage.  I would definitely order this again.

Rick & Ann’s became an instant favorite and will definitely be revisited on future trips to the Bay Area.  I loved the atmosphere and the menu was creative and left me wishing I were hungry enough to try them all.

Gregorio's Italian Kitchen

Gregorio's Italian Kitchen
4200 Wyoming Blvd. NE
Albuquerque, NM 87111

**UPDATE: OCTOBER 2012
We are sad to inform our readers that Gregorio's has closed. We will miss this awesome restaurant and hope that the owners of The Range and Standard Diner will incorporate some of the delicious Gregorio's offerings in the other two restaurants.
********************

Gregorio’s Italian Kitchen is owned by the same man who owns The Range – one of our favorite restaurants (see our review under the Old Favorites category).  We were excited to try Gregorio's and see what we thought.  It’s located in the corner of a strip mall, tucked back off the Montgomery and Wyoming intersection - locals will remember it as the former location of The Range before it moved to its current location.  The space is delightfully decorated, Italian themed of course, with some kitschy accent items and a gorgeous suspended wood ceiling.  There are tables out on the patio and a charming gas fireplace for both ambience and possible warmth when the wind is blowing! 

The menu is large and features an extensive wine and beer list.  Also, the wine list is featured on a wine table on the table adding a fun aesthetic to the experience.   There were many traditional Italian dishes, pasta dishes, lots of appetizers, and pizza to choose from.  Once we were seated, the waiter brought us a glass of homemade cheese straws – rustic, cheesy, crunchy bread sticks that were very addictive and delicious.  We asked what the most popular dish was and were told “Matt’s Pizza” and a few pasta dishes.  We had decided on pizza before arriving so we chose that and decided to split the Italian Chop Salad.



Italian Chop Salad with Rustic Homemade Breadsticks



The kitchen staff nicely separated and served our salad on two plates, something we didn’t ask for and appreciated.  The salad featured bacon, pepperoni, grilled chicken, provolone cheese, tomatoes, zucchini, pickled red onions, bell peppers, kalamata olives and parmesan cheese.  The salad greens were fresh and crisp and it was arranged beautifully on the plate.  The Creamy Italian Dressing was incredibly good, slightly sweet and tangy.  It was so good, we caught ourselves dipping our forks into it just to enjoy it by itself!  It was that good.  The salad is easily large enough for two and since we didn’t want to fill up it, we asked for a carry out box AND a container of the dressing, which we gratefully accepted.  The next day, it was just as delicious!

The pizza was of moderate size – maybe 12 inches in diameter.  It featured hand tossed dough that was crisp and thin, and the pizza was cut into small, manageable pieces.  The marinara sauce was spicy and the mozzarella cheese was gooey and hot.  The pizza was cooked on a stone, giving the crust a nice deep flavor.  It was steaming hot when delivered to the table and ready to eat – no need to add anything to make it taste perfect.  It was properly seasoned, delightfully prepared and very, very good.  It came with green chili, pepperoni, fresh sliced mushrooms, grilled onions (so good), and lots of cheese.  Overall, it was delicious and we plan to have it again soon!

Matt's Pizza

For dessert, we selected the Zabaglione and the Spumoni Sundae.  The Zabaglione was frozen and sliced like a pie, covered in chocolate with lots of toasted almonds.  It was delicious, creamy and had just the right amount of sweetness without being overpowering.  The Spumoni Sundae featured three varieties – pink, green, and brown - all delicious - covered in chocolate sauce and whipped cream.  Like the Zabaglione, it was creamy and not too sweet.  We enjoyed both desserts very much.

Spumoni Sundae

The Grove

The Grove

600 Central SE

Albuquerque, NM

The  Grove in SE Albuquerque has the following motto: local and organic produce, all-natural meats, artisan breads and cheeses.  We love good food and this certainly sounded like where to get it, so we went to The Grove to see what it was all about.

The restaurant itself has a very pleasing environment.  The walls are painted light blue with green accents and the white plank ceiling is charming.  There are lots of windows, pretty organic sort of pictures on the walls, a concrete floor, and large patio area outside.  It was rather warm so we decided to eat inside. 



Restaurant View from the Dining Area

At The Grove, you walk up to the counter and order from a large menu written on a chalkboard on the wall above and behind it.  There is a large breakfast menu, but it was 1:00 p.m. on a Saturday and we opted for lunch.  They serve breakfast all day and lunch starts at 11:00.  There were salads, sandwiches, and soup on the lunch menu and a large selection of coffee drinks from which to choose.  There is no soda fountain and drinks are of the more natural variety featuring juices and some sparkling beverages (one of us had a headache and was hoping for a Coke but that was not to be had and was disappointing but not unexpected).  There were fresh baked breads, cookies, cupcakes, and macaroons for dessert and they all looked lovely. 

Part of the atmosphere comes from the huge bank of windows
bringing in lots of natural light.

We chose two sandwiches – the Three Cheese and the Turkey Toastie.  They came with only one option for a side – fresh fruit.  We like fresh fruit, but were hoping for potato chips or another choice.  Having only fresh fruit for a side was disappointing.  In addition to the sandwiches, we also chose the Passion Fruit, Banana Salted Caramel, and Chocolate cupcakes to try.

The dining room was full with the lunch crowd, but after you place your order and pay for your ticket, a waiter will help you find a table.  We had a small table next to a bank of windows looking out onto the patio which was fine.  The room was noisy, but not offensively so; the tables were close, but since the wait staff was only delivering finished plates, they didn’t present any obstacles.  Shortly after we were seated the lunch rush began to clear and things quieted down. 



Simple, organic images adorn the walls.

While we waited for our sandwiches, we tried the three different cupcakes.  The Passion Fruit cupcake was lovely, iced, and topped with a slice of glazed orange.  The cake was moist and dense and simply delicious, filled with passion fruit flavor.  The icing was good and not too sweet, but the glazed orange slice tasted overripe and unappealing.  Other than that, we absolutely loved it!  Such a unique, sweet, flavorful, surprisingly delightful, and perfect dessert.  We would suggest you definitely try one, but skip the garnish!

Clockwise from top left: Banana Salted Caramel, Passion Fruit, Chocolate

The Banana Salted Caramel cupcake was not as impressive.  The base was more banana bread than cake, dense and sweet and was very good.  The salted caramel icing was too salty and we did not care for it.  It did not compliment the banana bread and after one taste we wanted no more of it.  We scraped it off and ate the banana bread instead!  We’ve had other salted caramel desserts that were heavenly, but this one missed the mark.  For caramel, the icing was too light and over whipped and again, too salty.

The Chocolate cupcake looked lovely.  It was iced with chocolate ganache and topped with semisweet chocolate discs.  The ganache was good, but a little too sweet for our taste, and the cake was dry and crumbly.  The cake flavor was rich and not too sweet and went well with the ganache, but it was so dry we didn’t eat it.  We picked the chocolate discs off the top and they were good, but we weren't wowed.

After about fifteen minutes our sandwiches arrived served on metal trays lined with parchment paper.  There were three bread and butter pickles on each plate next to the sandwiches and a small dish of fruit salad.  The fruit salad consisted of red grapes, some of which were past their prime and unappetizing, chopped apple, cantaloupe, and strawberries.  They were macerated in what tasted like sugar and it was sweet, but not overly so.  It wasn't a particularly unique fruit salad – more like what you’d make at home – but fresh.

The Three Cheese sandwich for $6.95 was sourdough bread filled with cheddar, havarti, and provolone cheese grilled in a Panini press.  The bread was nicely toasted and crunchy but very greasy.  You can order green chili, sweet pickles, or caramelized onions to go on your sandwich, which we did not, but wished we had.  This was basically a dressed up grilled cheese sandwich.  The sourdough bread was nice, but it was a very plain, flavorless sandwich overall.  We would definitely recommend trying it with one of the additions if you order it.  Perhaps some hot green chili would spice it up.  Not sure how sweet pickles would work but you can decide on your own about that.

Three Cheese Sandwich

The Turkey Toastie for $9.50 was roasted turkey, whole grain mustard, tomato, and havarti cheese on whole wheat bread, again toasted in a Panini press.  The whole grain bread was nice, but overall, this sandwich had no flavor.  Let’s face it, turkey is bland, havarti cheese is bland, and although there was some whole grain mustard on the sandwich, there wasn’t enough to give it the punch it needed.  We would have liked to see some sun dried tomatoes, or peperoncini, or even more mustard to help out.  Or maybe offer it with pepper jack cheese -that would have been nice to give it a kick.  The bread and butter pickles were good on the side, but three tiny pickle slices could not save the day.



Toastie Turkey Sandwich
(tomatoes ordered on the side, but usually come on the sandwich).



There is a water refill station in the dining room where you can get more water if you like, but the entire time we were there – over an hour – the water container was empty.  Several diners went for water and were disappointed as they did not notice that the far right register at the ordering counter is designated for to go orders as well as refills.  The refill station was refilled just before we left.

We did not eat all of our lunch at The Grove.  After a few bites of each sandwich we determined they were just average and we picked at the parts we wanted, but left a good amount on the trays.  Overall this is a nice, pleasant restaurant, but the quality of the sandwiches, the options available and the whole experience were not enough to make us want to go back.  If we were in that part of town and hungry, we might try it again.  It wasn’t bad, it just wasn’t that great.  And in our opinion, when you’re going out, you want something great, something more than you would make at home, something to make you smile.  That didn’t happen here.  It was fine.  Nice, clean, pleasant, but just fine.  Nothing to write home about.



Cool Water Fusion

Cool Water Fusion

2010 Wyoming NE, Suite B
Albuquerque, NM 87112

Have you ever shown up at a party way overdressed?  You know, you walk in with your sparkly dress, your date has on a suit, and everyone else is in jeans?  Remember how you felt?  Well, that’s pretty much the sensation you’ll get at Cool Water Fusion.  The restaurant is located in a strip mall next to a dollar store, and across the parking lot from Walmart, but the owners are reaching for an upscale experience.  You virtually must have reservations – something we were told the first time we walked in and tried to get a table.  That time the entire restaurant was empty except for one table and when we pointed that out to the waiter at the door, he simply walked away back into the kitchen and didn’t return.  That’s a lot of pretense and we were very put off.  But, armed with a Groupon deal, we decided to try again, this time WITH a reservation for 6:00 on a Saturday evening.

We arrived on time and although there were only two of us, we made the reservation for three.  We did this because the seating inside is very, very close and in order to maximize the space there are tiny tables crammed up against the far wall with bar stools.  They looked and felt like an after thought and we did not want to risk being seated there. You may frown at our under handed methods, but once you see the inside of this place, you’ll understand.  There is barely room between the tables for the wait staff to walk.  The overall feel of the place is cramped.  The front is completely plate glass windows and being there at sunset, the glare was horrible.  We aren’t sure why they didn’t at least install blinds – the view is the front of Walmart and the parking lot - nothing spectacular that would be lost with window coverings.  It was hot all evening, and being a Saturday, they had a live guitarist/singer who unfortunately failed to see how small the venue was and had his mike up too high.  The music was deafening and everyone was  either speaking loudly to hear their table's conversations or refrained from conversation, defeated by the less than wonderful entertainment.  The décor in the restaurant is eclectic; the walls are painted bright blue, orange, and red and the ceiling is unfinished and painted black.  There is a beautiful, but small built in aquarium unfortunately placed adjacent to a large TV installed on a nearby wall that ran ads for Twitter and Facebook, also encouraging people to rate the restaurant on urbanspoon and Yelp!

We were confused by the attempt to make the restaurant upscale.  There were white table cloths on the tables, but the silverware was mismatched and cheap, the salt and pepper shakers were of the lowest diner variety, and to add insult to injury, our appetizer came on a cracked plate.  Not too upscale.  The crowd was dressed mostly in T-shirts, but the wait staff was dressed well, and we noticed several of the diners had coupons like ours.

The menu was unimpressive.  Eight dinner entrees were offered of very basic fare like fried chicken (blue corn breaded) and trout, but the waiter did try to sell us the specials “that were left.” This was problematic and confusing - first thought: why would they sell us "what was left" and second thought: how could it be "what was left" when we were in the early part of the dinner crowd?  We were there at 6:00 p.m. and we wondered who ate the specials that were gone.  We ordered crab cakes for the appetizer and waited for 20 minutes until they arrived.  The service was very slow all night long in spite of there being few tables, several waiters, and many empty tables for the first part of the evening.

The crab cakes were positively the worst we’ve ever had.  There was no visible crab and they mostly consisted of very greasy bread.  The flavor was just butter and when we tried to move them from the serving plate to our individual plates, they disintegrated, falling apart all over the place.  The serving plate was cracked all the way across, which we believe is against health code rules, but we’re checking on that.  After we finished with the crab cakes, which we didn’t finish, we waited another 25 minutes for the entrées.

We both ordered the flat iron steak – one medium rare and one medium.  The menu said they came with garlic mashed potatoes and organic green beans.  The plates had ample servings on them, but both our steaks were well done - very well done.  The garlic mashed potatoes had no discernible garlic flavor, but we did see one part of a clove in one serving.  They were good, but just tasted like plain potatoes.  The green beans were absolutely drenched in butter and there was no way to taste anything but that.  The green bean flavor was completely missing.  Our waiter was MIA for most of this time, but when another server came to fill our water glasses, we informed her about the overcooked steaks and she sent the waiter over.  Unfortunately, by the time he came over and offered to make them again, we were pretty much done.  Plus, we didn't want to wait another 25 minutes for new steaks.  He offered to give us free desserts - a very nice surprise and good gesture - which we decided to order.

Flat Iron Steak, Garlic Mashed Potatoes, and Green Beans

We ordered Strawberry Cheesecake which the waiter said was a heavy white cake topped with strawberry jam and then covered with cheesecake.  And we ordered a Banana Split Pie, which was an ice cream pie in a pie crust with sliced bananas.

The Banana Split Pie was as described.  It was okay.  The ice cream was not premium quality and was quite icy, and the frozen bananas at the bottom tasted horrible, having been too ripe when added to the pie.  The slice was sitting in a pool of chocolate and strawberry syrup with a sliced banana.  It was average and not what we would consider gourmet by any standard.

Banana Split Pie

The Strawberry Cheesecake was nothing like the waiter’s description.  The base was some sort of nut cake – maybe almond – which was covered with strawberry jam and a very, very thin layer of cream cheese.  The top layer was the thickest and it appeared to be some sort of whipped topping, which may or may not have had some cream in it.  It was very disappointing.



Strawberry Cheesecake



Overall, our experience at Cool Water Fusion was uncomfortable due to the incredible noise level, the loud music, the hot temperature and the constant traffic of the wait staff running into each other as they tried to navigate the kitchen door and the tables.  We both had headaches by the time we left and vowed never to return. 



To really add to the horrible experience - the Groupon deal was for 2 glasses of wine or 2 beers, one appetizer, and two entrees.  We didn't order the wine/beer and the desserts were offered free to compesnate us for the steaks being cooked incorrectly.  The waiter informed us that the Groupon deal doesn't cover tax so we had to pay tax on every item we ordered including the free desserts!!!  Granted it was only about $5, but it still was more than we should have paid given that we didn't order the wine/beer and a single glass of wine would have been $7.  No other Groupon we've redeemed has required tax to be paid - draw your own conclusion....

You can see the entire menu online if you’re interested.  We’ve heard it’s a better experience for lunch, but we won’t go back to find out.  And by the way, we made the reservation online and got a confirmation text before we went.  We also got another confirmation text that woke one of us up at 3:00 a.m. the next morning, and another confirmation text the next afternoon.  You know, to remind us to go last night.

So, this place is a mess.  We don’t recommend it at all.   And apparently 28% of Urbanspooners agree with us.  Don't take our word for it - check out the reviews for yourself: